valerie luxe espn

Valerie Luxe Does Porn and She Has Feelings, Too

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As many of you already know, I posted the news that Pistons rookie was in the middle of an epic twitter race to 4,000 followers with a pornstar, Valerie Luxe. The next day it was linked on ESPN, Deadspin, and The Big Lead amongst other websites that have a plethora of readers. As a result, it gained a lot of attention, and deservedly so — it’s an interesting, unheard of before “twitter-off” that the two parties involved publicized for the world to see.

So did I do something wrong here? Absolutely not.  I’m only guilty of putting this on my blog before other bloggers did, as it was an already public matter by being on DaJuan Summers’ and Valerie Luxe’s public Twitter profiles. I merely shed some light on something interesting I discovered on the social network that is providing many media outlets with plenty of stories these days.  It then gained a little more attention because some of the bigger blogs and the World Wide Leader in Sports linked to it. Shame on me.

But this “pornstar”, and I’m reluctant to call her a star of any sort, took exception to me broaching the story of her and DaJuan Summers’ race to 4,000 followers:

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So as you see, a hate-tweet, a settings change by Ms. Luxe to protect her tweets from being visible to the general public, and then her even going as far as blocking me from sending her requests to follow her.  I’m heartbroken.

I probably would have told Valerie to not get her panties all in a bunch, but from the looks of her Twitter picture it appears that they are already bunched up inside her butt. That’s probably not the only thing that’s been up her butt, either. I bet I couldn’t even reply to her anyway, since I’m blocked. It’s funny she protects her twitter tweets, yet you can Google her name and see her flashing her twatter for the world to see all over the internet (e.g. BangBros).

What Valerie fails to realize is I probably did her a service (heh, service) by posting her name in the first place. If it weren’t for me, thousands of people would still not know who the eff Valerie Luxe is.  Before DaJuan Summers’ initial tweet, I certainly had no idea who she was and that’s not because I don’t watch porn.  Each, she and DaJuan, have gained roughly around 500 followers in the past 24 hours and I’m sure her “adult film” viewings are up, too. Ultimately, she should be thanking me, not hating me.

But I’m a sad excuse for a human being.  I don’t know how I’m ever going to be able to tell my kids I had a hobby of writing on a blog for fun. I’m so prideless. Are you catching my sarcasm, Valerie? I’m laying it on about as thick as that male genital you took this afternoon at your job. You’re a pornstar who gets “manhandled” for money. If you want to call out journalists, bloggers, writers, or asshole men who have talked about this race you’re having, you probably should have thought long and hard (that’s what you said) about your day job first, before trying to make an ill-advised case for yourself.

Since you sent me that tweet, I’ve read your MySpace, I’ve read your profile on Bang Bros, and I’ve done my research on your “profession.” And I think I’m ready to admit it… you’re a pornstar and you get humped dry by random dudes daily and get paid based on how many million other random dudes watch your shit while they have a callous hand down their pants. In my initial post, I had no problem saying “I’m ok with a woman who makes a living for herself,” but, if you want to call me out, I’m going to tell you how it really is: you’re a pornstar and there’s NOTHING classy about what you do.

Furthermore, your tweet to me is about as contradicting as your MySpace profile — I’m a pornstar, but I’m not a slut. How can you justify that, Valerie?  My “job” for this blog, which isn’t about money since I do this solely for fun, is to provide readers with interesting stories about their Detroit sports teams/athletes. Sadly, and you were right about one thing, the most interesting thing at midnight August 5th was one of our own, Pistons rookie DaJuan Summers having a twitter race with a porn star. You might think it’s normal, but it’s not something you see every day, Valerie.

By the way, you forgot one tiny aspect about making your tweets private: you’re a pornstar so PornStarTweet will probably make public anything you say (thanks to a horny reader who pointed this out):

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And based on these tweets, you’ve hurt your cause even more. Why in the world would you challenge a random NBA rookie to a twitter race if you had never met him and he probably never knew who you were before? If you ask me, you knew exactly what you were doing when you asked DaJuan Summers for that challenge.  You wanted to gain all the extra attention that an NBA player could provide.  Did you not receive that? You’re more popular now than you would have ever been before. You protect your tweets like your some innocent girl hiding from what people might think of you, yet you’re flaunting yourself naked on the internet doing… you know what.  Interesting…What’s it going to be? Are you proud of what you do and say or are you ashamed?

No matter what you say or think, you’re a pornstar, it’s looked down upon by the majority of America (when they’re not alone in their rooms), and you’re being uber-defensive about a profession you claim to be fulfilling on a daily basis. The only thing it’s fulfilling is your vagina.

Congratulations, I just made you that much more popular.  I’m guessing you knew exactly what Ben Stiller meant when he said in the movie Dodgeball, “total facial LaFleur,” otherwise I’d be saying that to you right now.

About Bob Biscigliano

Bob is a writer of s(p)orts, fan of Detroit, southpaw, movie quoter, a-hole with a great kitchen, one hell of a model American

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