Tim Tebow’s Tears Would Make a Great Stocking Stuffer

timtebowebay

Yes, Tim Tebow’s tears are on Ebay.  They might be a great present in place of coal this season.  A couple drops of Tim Tebow’s tears could make your kid a Saint:

Up for sale is an actual vial of Tim Tebow’s tears. These tears, squeezed from multiple tissues and shoulders at the Georgia Dome, may not be the last tears we see from Tim Tebow, but they may certainly be the most valuable to any and all Gator Haters throughout the world. 

After being held to 13 points and being unable to score any points in the entire second half, Tebow let these tears fly, just like his chances of winning the Heisman or another National Championship as a senior. His red zone interception during the third quarter likely sealed the Gators’ fate, ensuring Alabama’s shot at the BCS National Championship game.

Here’s some information about these tears, how you will receive them, and what they can do for you:

> These tears will come in a glass vial similar to the one shown in this aucition’s pictures. Due to the volatile nature of Tim Tebow’s tears, finding a recepticle to contain these tears can be unpredictable, but it is important to know that you will be getting actual tears from the ducts of #15.*

> Though little experimentation has been done on these tears, early studies have shown that these tears may have the ability of non-surgically circumcising a child as well as returning one’s virginity upon dousing.

>  The Vial of Tim Tebow’s Tears makes a great Holiday Gift for Florida State, Georgia, Alabama, LSU, Tennessee, and any other Gator hating fan.

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask on the listing!

I just can’t believe someone tried putting a price on them….

[Ebay]

About Bob Biscigliano

Bob is a writer of s(p)orts, fan of Detroit, southpaw, movie quoter, a-hole with a great kitchen, one hell of a model American

Quantcast